Member Testimonial: Michael Aziz

I have been coming to The Church of the River for two years. How did I end up here and why do I keep coming back? A string of sorrows nearly took all of my hope from me.

My journey to COR started after a computer algorithm decided to send me to Memphis to complete subspecialty training in Maternal and Fetal Medicine and Surgery. Some call it high risk obstetrics. Even though I was happy for the opportunity, I knew almost nothing about Memphis and even less about the people who lived here. As I started to learn more about Memphis, the 2016 election happened. I took the results really personally.

I began to fear that the shining city on the hill that my parents emigrated to had been tarnished. So, I got my family together, and we moved to Memphis.

Throughout surgical subspecialty training I forgot about self-care. It may or may not surprise you that physicians traditionally do not take care of themselves. I even took pride in it. I would brag about sleeping eight hours per week or how I would measure my coffee intake by the carafe. Rev. Teitel has compared his experience being a Chaplin in a hospital to being “lowered into the abyss”, but he was eventually pulled back out. I thought I understood the challenges of my profession, but I didn't grasp the that giving radically bad news on a daily basis would take such a deep emotional toll.

I started to withdraw socially. I told some very close friends and colleagues that their politics had reached a point that I couldn't associate with them any longer. I went even deeper and started to "embrace the suck," as they say, and I would entertain myself by arguing with bigots and anti-vaccine activists online and in person. I thought that I was hardened enough that there was nothing that would hurt or surprise me anymore. I was wrong.

I was being bombarded by a lowlight reel of tragedy. Near daily assaults on women, intellectuals, scientists, Muslims, Latinos, proponents of multiculturalism, and even the constitution, led me to believe that there was no bottom which would ever be reached after which we might improve. Somehow, I had to be hopeful for the future; after all, I am a father and husband.

Initially, I came to The Church of the River to help my family to make friends and meet like-minded people. Overall, I consider myself to be a skeptic and a scientist. It never crossed my mind that I would benefit from the spirit of friendship and the warmth of community. But the more of my energy which I have given to COR, the more hope I have had for the future. Here we not only have confronted our national and local crises head on, but we have also taken great pains to mobilize and act instead of just retreating to comfort and complaining.

I would urge you to support this church, because if you are anything like me, it has given or will give you something priceless: hope.