Member Testimonial: Mimsy Conaway
Church Talk
Religion was confusing to me, growing up with a mother who was devoutly Catholic and a father who was Jewish by birth but basically disdainful of all religious groups, Jews included - but most especially the Catholics. My father's simple and definitive explanation for any marital problems was that my mother had been brainwashed by the pope. Interestingly, this did not stop these two religious misfits from producing nine children together within 14 years.
My brothers and sisters and I all started our early schooling with the nuns at St. Agnes and the brothers at St. Dominic who made sure that we were well versed in the detailed descriptions of heaven, hell, and purgatory... and specific instructions on how to get to each place.
On Sundays, my mother piled us all in the big Buick station wagon - (remember those cars, 5 miles long with the fake wood paneling???) and off we went to Mass at the mysterious Cathedral of the Immaculate Conception, the girls' heads covered and our ears unable to comprehend the service, spoken entirely in Latin. Upon arriving home from church, my father would hand out our allowances which he had intentionally withheld earlier- so that we would not be persuaded to put our money "in the hat" as he called the collection plate at church.
As I grew older, I matriculated in and out of Christian youth groups and bible studies to which I truly wanted to belong but always felt somewhat of an imposter, a religious refugee with no real homeland. Truth is, I always got the feeling when I was very young and attending Catholic school, that being Jewish was somehow not such a "good" thing, but it wasn't until I left Catholic school in the 6th grade and entered a non-denominational Christian-based school that I found out being Catholic was not necessarily any better.
When I was 17, and the year my parents divorced, I just walked away from all of it- the Catholic Church, the youth groups... my understanding of god.
When I married Alex at age 22, I had been on a religious hiatus for years and I saw no need to complicate an otherwise wonderful and complete relationship by bringing the subject up! After all, religion had not done my parents' marriage any good! We were very compatible in our decision to avoid the religion issue altogether.
A long and winding road eventually led Alex and me here to The Church of the River… a road littered with the typical assortment of life experiences which would lead us to believe that we needed to search for the broader picture, find something greater than ourselves, and as Burton would say, to "grow our souls".
We've been married now for almost 30 years and members of this church for the past 10.
In this place, we have found that we can truly 'seek the truth with love' and not feel judged or condemned if we do not believe as others do. There are no prefabricated religious formulas here, just an environment of encouragement and intellectual stimulation that help us along our journey.
It has been a place where our three children- Gordon, Shea, and Mary- have grown up testing and exploring their own individual spiritual paths with the encouragement to remain open minded and inclusive toward others. It's been a place that I've come to think of as my spiritual home away from home, a place where I come to feel nurtured and renewed, inspired to be a better person, which I believe is true for me as a result of belonging to this place.
So, how do you put a value on something this great? What about the awesome people who belong to this church whom I've learned so much from? The emotional and spiritual support and sense of community? What about the religious education my children have received here. The opportunities offered regularly to get involved in service and to grow my soul?
There is a Joseph Campbell quote, one of my favorites in which he references the sacrifice and commitment required in a marriage. He says that "In marriage, you are not sacrificing yourself to the other person. You are sacrificing yourself to the relationship.” I believe likewise that anyone or anything that is truly valuable to us -- requires our sacrifice and our commitment. And it seems the more we give, the more we receive. In belonging and giving to the church and this community, we are actually investing in ourselves and in our own well-being. For me, it is like my yoga practice. The more faithful and committed I am the more healthy and whole I become. So it is with my church.
So, I guess that pretty much sums up why I am here, what the church means to me, and why I keep coming back. for this opportunity to continue to grow my soul-- here, at The Church of the River.